This Week's Tips:

How have you coped with your own frustrations about being a caregiver or parent of a child with ASD?

Taking a look around and realizing it could be worse. Granted, I’m not strolling through the park here but, I keep thinking that he can only get better.
- Mother, Lives in Ohio
- Child: Son; 2 years old; Diagnosis: PDD-NOS; Age at Diagnosis: 1 year old;

My daily schedule has totally been rearranged to accommodate therapy time. I feel I’ve had to give up my freedom to come and go as I need to. It was a very difficult summer, with no spontaneity to do things like go to the zoo.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 3 years old; Diagnosis: PDD-NOS; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;

I have good friends and family. I talk to my friends and try to take time for myself. You can’t help your child if you don’t take some time for yourself.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 11 years old; Diagnosis: Autistic Disorder; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;

Laughed, cried and gone to work. Talking to others with the same mess is helpful.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 13 years old; Diagnosis: PDD-NOS; Age at Diagnosis: 5 years old;

Talking to the psychiatrist helps. So does participating in the Yahoo Wisconsin Autism listserv. The principal at Chris’s charter school has a teenage daughter on the spectrum, and the principal and her family are good friends.
- Father, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 10 years old; Diagnosis: PDD-NOS; Age at Diagnosis: 3 years old;

Talking—a lot. I try as much as possible to have my own pleasurable activities in life so not to feel that having pleasure isn’t possible. I am a fighter and very tactfully address the weaknesses in this system to feel that I am doing my part in helping these children and their families.
- Mother, Lives in Michigan
- Child: Daughter; 9 years old; Diagnosis: Pervasive Development Disorder; Age at Diagnosis: 3 years old;

Faith in God.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 15 years old; Diagnosis: Asperger Syndrome; Age at Diagnosis: 4 years old;

I am still working in this arena. This is all very new for us. I sometimes wonder if I am the best parent for him but I know that he is a gift from God and that together we can learn and grow. I also have learned to take time for myself and do something that is totally separated from him. I scrapbook for a hobby, so I find scrapbook parties to go to once a month or every other month. That helps a lot. I also use my resources; friends, therapist to talk things through with.
- Mother, Lives in Michigan
- Child: Son; 4 years old; Diagnosis: PDD-NOS; Age at Diagnosis: 4 years old;

Prayer and the support of online friends, particularly parents of children on the spectrum, who are there to listen when I need to tell about a day that few other people would understand.
- Mother, Lives in Michigan
- Child: Son; 4 years old; Diagnosis: PDD-NOS; Age at Diagnosis: 4 years old;

Talking with family and friends, going on the Internet and reading what other have and are going through. Seeing that I am not alone, going to workshops, and learning what I can.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 9 years old; Diagnosis: Asperger Syndrome; Age at Diagnosis: 3 years old;

I coped well while we were in the throes of the therapies, and suppressed my own grief and depression. That is NOT a good idea, because those feelings tend to pool and then threaten to drown you. Parents need to take breaks periodically. I was like a therapeutic demon—and that’s not wise.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 7 years old; Diagnosis: Pervasive Development Disorder; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;

I never stop to think about it. It IS what it IS and I have no time to deal with that. I don’t feel sorry for myself...I just congratulate myself for getting through the day and start again.
- Mother, Lives in Michigan
- Child: Son; 8 years old; Diagnosis: Asperger Syndrome; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;

By asking for help when I need it. By praying and going to church and reading the Bible everyday. By taking intentional breaks such as ladies’ night out, or just some time to myself when my husband is home.
- Mother, Lives in Ohio
- Child: Son; 5 years old; Diagnosis: PDD-NOS; Age at Diagnosis: 3 years old;

Once I was angry and bitter and felt this was so unfair and “what about me and my personal goals,” etc. I don’t remember when or how these issues dissolved, but the adaptation was made and I don’t think of it much anymore. Probably came about the same time as my acceptance.
- Father, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Daughter; 13 years old; Diagnosis: Autistic Disorder; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;

I am currently on anti-depressants. Its not a cure all, but I dont break down and cry as much as i used to
- mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 4 years old; Diagnosis: pdd-nos; Age at Diagnosis: 3 years old;

It isn’t always easy. But I try to get away once in awhile, even if it is just to grocery shop alone. I have been on and off of anti-depressants, but mostly I cope by talking to family. I am close to my mother and she is a great listener, even though she doesn’t have the answers. I talk to my husband about the day when he gets home. He has even taken a job closer to home, just in case. I have never called him home from work, but it is still a comfort to know I can if I need to. I try to ask for help, from my husband or mom, before I feel overly frustrated.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 5 years old; Diagnosis: Autistic Disorder; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;

I try very hard to get time to go out alone with my husband for dinner at least once a month. I think this really helps one connect with ones individuality. You are not bound to your child alone —you will have a life outside your current situation given time.
- Mother, Lives in Wisconsin
- Child: Son; 3 years old; Diagnosis: Autistic Disorder; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;

I have coped by having some great people to talk to who understand. First of all, my husband—who can relate any better then he can? I have some great friends who have been with me through it all bless their hearts, but I think they too have had the experience of great joy through my son as well. I also try to find a little time to exercise daily and to spend some time with my husband daily.
- Mother, Lives in Florida
- Child: Son; 6 years old; Diagnosis: Autistic Disorder; Age at Diagnosis: 2 years old;